Over the past few months, I have been so stressed that my wife cornered me on more than one occasion to let me know how “grumpy” I have been with the children and with her. My first reaction … No way! You’re the grumpy one, chica!
I soon realized that my wife was right when I started dreaming in grumpy. Last week I woke up at about 3:00am with anger in my mind and a frown on my face. I woke up from an insanely realistic dream where I was yelling at my children, picking apart my wife and kicking the cat. I woke up and wanted to run away from myself.
Language studies show that if you begin to dream in a foreign language, then you are comfortable with the foreign language and may be on the verge of fluency. So what does it mean when you dream that you are angry and “on edge” with everyone? I think it means you are angry and “on edge” with everyone … and on the verge of hurting those you most care about. Here is what you can do turn those dreams around?
- If you’ve yelled at your kids, it is never too late to apologize. Even where a few days has gone by, my children truly appreciate (and understand) when I take them to the side to “say sorry” for being grumpy. Addy Joy, do you remember when Daddy yelled at you two days ago for getting out of bed? Well, I am sorry. I should not have yelled at you. It is your job to stay in bed and it is my job to teach you to obey instructions. But it was wrong of me to yell at you. Will you forgive me? Those words can make a huge impact on a child.
- If you’ve been short with your wife, it is never too late to open up to her. Just because my wife is an adult, I cannot assume that she will fully appreciate the stress that consumes me during the day. I am learning to make a concerted effort to take a few “moments of silence” after pulling into the driveway to prepare for my entrance into the home. Again, the words are simple: Honey-babe-schmoopy-pie … I am sorry for not understanding how my stresses affect you and the kids. It’s been tough on me for the past few days and I forget that we are on the same team. Will you forgive me? Most of the time, she will embrace you with open arms. And by the way, sweetie, wanna make out?
- If are you dreaming in grumpy, it is never too late to change. Luckily for me (and for my family), I have only had one grumpy dream. But it was a huge wake-up call (…pun intended…) that I needed to change my attitude toward my children. I realize that my grumpiness is not going to solve the stresses that are making me grumpy. Does that make sense? If eating ice cream is not going to help you lose weight, then why would yelling at your kids or spouse help you with the stresses at work, or the financial strains, or the problem you may be having with a friend. It won’t.
Are you dreaming in grumpy? If so, how can you turn those dreams around?